Sich vorsehen was du etwas wünschst

Well, as of this week I am a gainfully employed personal chef with two actual clients. (Alas, neither of them is Brangelina, who did not move in on our street, but the new rumor is they have a place about 10 minutes from my apartment, AND Tom&Katy are in Berlin too -- the Germans HATE him. They are not fans of Scientology).

Anyway, the first client is pretty great (although they are somewhat in denial regarding my total lack of a work visa). I'll be making a staff lunch for them every Wednesday. I get to make whatever I want, they seem to like everything, they always say thank you, they do their own dishes, and help carry things (which is key as the office is 3rd floor, no elevator and food for 15 people plus platters weighs a lot more than you'd think). Last week was Middle Eastern-themed. I made hummus & whole wheat flatbread, tabbouleh, spiced lamb meatballs, rice salad with cucumber & yogurt, watermelon-feta salad, and for dessert: stuffed dates, sesame brittle, and I bought some halvah and cut it into pretty cubes. Once again, I was too busy to take pictures, but maybe next week....

I wasn't feeling that good about my trial for the Producer family, aka the Hollywoods, but they called and said they really liked my food so now, for better or worse, it's a three times a week deal (7 lunches and 6 dinners a week). It turns out the interviewed someone else who was "too fancy" for them. This would not be difficult as they really only eat plain chicken breasts, macaroni & cheese, and broccoli (why you need a personal chef for such haute cuisine is beyond me). Yesterday I made meatballs that were quite plain (just a little Parmesan cheese and parsley), but abolutely delicious. I was told that they looked "poopy." I really don't know how to argue with that kind of logic. I am pretty sure that there will be a lot of head-banging going on as a result of the Hollywoods and their adorable but beastly children. Luckily, it's a limited gig: they reinvade the US in November. Also, I've decided that the only way to remain even a little sane doing this job is to decide that the wife/mother was lying or wrong when she said she didn't like pie. Anyway, I'm making a crostata on Sunday so we'll see if she eats pie in Italian. In response to the myriad angry messages I received regarding the lack of cooking detail in my previous post (which, in my defense, I posted before I was ready by accidentally clicking "publish" (I told you this technology thing was too much for me)), here is what I made for them yesterday: "poopy" meatballs & mashed potatoes with sauteed zucchini and peach crisp with strawberry ice cream for dessert; broccoli-chicken tetrazzini and green salad; for lunches/snacks: hummus, pita, & veggies, tuna salad, brownies and banana muffins. Are you still reading? This is boring food, I know, but we can't be too fancy, now can we? Stay tuned to see if I get fired after making them fresh tuna for Sunday dinner!